The Ultimate Success Formula
This article is about how to lead a successful and fulfilling life. Success doesn’t necessarily mean fabulous riches or fame. It means leading a purposeful, meaningful, happy and contented life with adequate financial means to do whatever you desire. The article is organised around skills you need to grow and develop, realise your dreams, and reach your potential. The skills are soundly backed up by the best psychological research currently available. These skills also constitute a useful success principles list, you can refer to again and again in your personal and professional development journey.
This will show the purpose and goals as well as how to reach them by providing a guiding force. It’s like when you don’t know where you want to go, problems arise. Without direction, your ship isn’t going to get anywhere and will probably end up stranded or destroyed.
This is the way to get to where you want to go by laying out a clear path and timetable. You need both if you are going to succeed in life, otherwise events will just happen without any direction or control. You could be lucky but that’s not usually so effective.
It’s like having a timetable with no plan for getting somewhere – nothing happens! Without time management, you won’t achieve your goals because they’re never worked on at all unless it’s absolutely necessary (like school homework). In addition, lack of time-management often leads people to think they have more free time than they do; thus increasing stress levels and decreasing work efficiency.
This is the way to get what you want. It’s like doing homework without a plan for getting better marks. You can work hard and do your best but if you don’t have a plan, then it will be difficult to show improvement. This skill is about making sure that you understand how you will be able to achieve your goals in the best possible way.
The way you think can make or break your success. Studies have shown that people who are optimistic tend to find the good in all situations, no matter how bad they are. Pessimistic people however will find fault and problems in themselves, others and any situation which arises – be it a failure or victory. This skill is about cultivating optimism so that you see the glass as half-full rather than half-empty; this positive attitude gives rise to increased work productivity towards achieving goals and living with happiness and contentment.
This is the way to make sure that you get what you want even when things go wrong by learning from your mistakes and moving on with a positive attitude. With no plan, you will surely fail, but by planning well, and then implementing it like a soldier on active duty, success is guaranteed!
Meaning of Life:
Everything in life has meaning whether we believe so or not. We can’t just do something because it makes money – there needs to be more than just material gain for us to be truly happy and fulfilled. The good news is that this skill is about finding out exactly what your meaning in life actually is through defining values and purpose in order to have an optimistic, meaningful and happy life full of contentment.
Determination, perseverance and patience are what get you there in the end. As you go through life you will meet setbacks, disappointments, obstacles and failures on the way. These should be seen as opportunities to be overcome and lessons learned on your journey toward achievement of your goals.
Becoming a good person in your own experience may be something you do instinctively. For example, honesty, willingness to help others, and reliability are all traits that will make life better for yourself and those around you. Trust is the primary foundation for any successful relationship, whether personal or professional.
People are driven to accomplish their goals by intrinsic or extrinsic motivations. By internal motivation, people see success potential as its own reward and original motivators such as excellence, achievement, mastery and a sense of purpose can be taking for granted leading to the feeling that they lack drive. There are many ways in which you can be motivated to learn and improve for the sake of your own sense of accomplishment. One way to do this is by setting small goals that you want to achieve, while also getting encouragement from those around you.
As we strive to succeed in our personal and professional lives, we need the support of others. Developing self-awareness, empathy, communication skills and assertiveness will help you achieve your goals. Getting along with other people is a prerequisite for living a happy and successful life.
It is very important to have self-esteem if you want other people to respect you. Those with high self-esteem see threats as opportunities and weaknesses as projects for improvement. Those with low self-esteem lack confidence, fail to use their natural talents, and thus never reach their true potential. To be successful in life it is crucial that we see ourselves as capable of being worthwhile – able – effective.
If we want to be successful over the course of our life and career, then we need to continue improving ourselves.
Gone are the days of neglecting continuous learning. Knowledge is now outdated within five years, so there must be an ongoing need for the updating of existing knowledge and expansion of new knowledge and skills.
People often lose control of their own lives and head off the rails because they lack certain skills, like emotional intelligence or a work-life balance. These skills are necessary to keep people on track and in order.
A well-formed, guiding vision is like a torch in the dark. It can help us traverse unfamiliar and difficult terrain to reach our objectives while keeping true to our values and beliefs along the way. A clearly defined vision will provide focus for you as an individual, organisation or family; facilitate your decision-making; maintain course (even through challenging times); break up monotony when things get rough—and celebrate with joy when things are going well!
A clear sense of purpose is the key to a successful life. Those who lack one are rampant with unhealthy habits, but those who have one can be more free and balanced.
If you are to achieve anything in life, then you must develop the discipline to do so.
This is one of the important skills needed for success: without it nothing worthwhile can be accomplished. Discipline provides us with structure to our lives—without which there is chaos and confusion. The further away we get from this ideal, the more difficult it becomes to connect up our various objectives and aspirations during times of change; we need a wide ranging set of disciplines if we are to accomplish everything that we wish to do in life!
Think back on your childhood (and perhaps teenage years) when school was fun rather than pressure-cooker steeped in stress and anxiety. Do you want to replicate that as an adult? If so, then we need to ensure you have the right people around you to help provide that environment for you.
This is about being active not passive—it’s been said before and will be said again: if you wait for things to happen they probably won’t (especially when it comes down to career progression). And even if something does come along, sometimes there can only be one winner-take-all scenario, leaving a lot of ‘losers’ left behind! We need more proactivity from ourselves because the world isn’t going to change just because we might want it to do so—we need to create our own opportunities through taking action.
This is about being passionate about what you do and being excited by what you are doing. If we apply this as an attitude then life becomes much more fun and fulfilling. This is the ‘joy of living’, which if developed can lead us towards a happy and balanced life.
Actions speak louder than words:
It seems obvious that our actions must match up with our motivations—that when we say something it should also be demonstrated in the way we act! Otherwise, we risk communicating two inconsistent messages: what others hear from us (through our words) may not be at all the same message they read into our behaviour (observed by them). And if we want to be taken seriously by others, then we have a responsibility to self-discipline ourselves first!
Make changes simple:
Creating change for yourself can sometimes feel very difficult but in order to really make the impact you desire it’s important that your objectives are clear and achievable—and don’t overwhelm you with too many things at once! By keeping things within your control, rather than letting them slip through your fingers, finding ways of simplifying them (so they become manageable) makes success a great deal more likely. This is what is meant by making change simple!
There is no doubt that positive thinkers achieve much more than those who are negative (there seems to be plenty of evidence that shows this to be the case). When we learn how to ‘think positive’ then we can see the world in a whole new light—and that makes all the difference.
Try out new things:
If you ever wish to be successful you need to try your hand at different skills and experiences. This is how we learn the best way of doing new things—and, usually, unexpected opportunities will present themselves that we would not otherwise have dreamt up or imagined!
Allotting yourself time for personal development:
What do you want to achieve in life? How far do you want to go with your career? And if so, when do you intend getting started on putting those goals into action and making them become reality? Each one of us has the capacity within us to become whoever (or whatever) we choose to become—it’s simply a case of learning what it takes by trying various things out. Maybe it’s time to take action!
Who are your key supporters or ‘gurus’? It’s true that we all need someone who can support us along our journey of life and help us in times when things aren’t going too well. So, if you have any mentors or coaches within our careers then making the most of their advice will likely prove worthwhile—there is never a substitute for first-hand knowledge!
Personal development over a long period of time:
Personal development does not happen overnight. When you look around this world there are many people who are very successful but they haven’t always been so—they have had to work hard at what they do and have had to learn from mistakes. It’s true that sometimes we have to stick with our goals for a longer period of time than we might want to—but it doesn’t mean that we can’t make things work out for us in the end!
Think outside the box:
When it comes down to making changes, perhaps you feel a little uninspired when thinking of ways in which you ‘could be doing better?’ Or is it simply because nothing new pops into your head when brainstorming possible solutions to problems? Well, this is what creativity is all about—it involves coming up with original ideas and approaches. So, why not start looking at life from another angle and see what could be done?
Make use of your talents:
When you really look at life, there is no way that you can be the best or have all the answers—so don’t beat yourself up about this. Instead, focus on what strengths you do possess and how these could benefit others—areas where you are competent already! This way you will realise that it makes sense to take advantage of them. Because when we learn how to make ourselves more valuable in other peoples’ eyes then it allows us to create new opportunities for ourselves—this process works both ways!
Don’t compare yourself to others:
The old adage ‘comparison is the thief of joy’ rings true here! It may seem an easy route to take when looking at the lives of others and thinking ‘I wish I could be doing what they are doing,’ but we need to realise that life is not a contest (and there can only ever be one winner) so why not try something new instead?
Make your goal sexy:
New opportunities for change will always present themselves if you allow yourself to ‘see’ them. By making the process of changing more appealing to yourself you make it easier on yourself and find it much easier to get going on making those changes happen! So, how do you make that possible? Try really getting into the heart and soul of your long-term goals—what feelings does this bring up in you? Use your imagination and see how far you can really go!
Do something every day:
If we are always thinking about the future then it is likely that we will miss out on important opportunities in our lives—both now and in the future too. When it comes to making changes, sometimes jumping into things head first can seem scary but showing yourself a little faith is all part of trying new things! By doing so you never know what might miraculously come your way.
It’s true there are times when life feels like it’s getting dull or monotonous—as if ‘nothing exciting is happening?’ This isn’t necessarily a bad thing though because this may mean that there simply aren’t any problems to worry about! But if there is something that you desire, or an issue that you want to change then don’t look at the whole process as being a chore—rather view it as an opportunity for personal growth. Because when we are willing to go through these changes head first then we will have no way of knowing what new experiences could come our way!
In order to progress and grow, as well as develop a better understanding of life itself, we need to keep on learning. It may seem obvious but it is probably one of the most important things you can do! Knowledge provides us with opportunities which we would otherwise miss out on—it helps us give ourselves every chance of success: without knowledge there will always be uncertainty, confusion and doubt.
But what does it mean to truly ‘know’ something? Steve Jobs said he “didn’t have to think any more in order to know” something. That means that we have fully understood or comprehended something to the point where it becomes a part of our total being—we don’t need to consciously think about it any longer because we now ‘know’ automatically, without thinking about it. And perhaps this is what true knowledge is all about: letting us get on with life by removing obstacles which otherwise would stop us from progressing as rapidly as possible!
See the big picture:
When you see things from a bigger perspective then it can often be easier to make decisions—not just because you have more information but also because it is simpler to comprehend. This means understanding why this particular issue or problem is important so that we can work towards resolving it and move on with life once again!
Which isn’t always easy, because what feels like an insignificant event may actually be part of something much larger—and by recognising its significance we are better able to provide ourselves with solutions and suggestions as well as being more confident in our decision making abilities too!
So how do we recognise something from a bigger perspective? It depends on the individual. There are times when all we need to do is to remind ourselves what we value, how we feel about something or even observe the actions of others. The point is to find something which inspires us and helps us feel comfortable with making decisions—we need a feeling of certainty from somewhere so that we can move forward!
Change will always occur when you least expect it so it’s not necessarily a bad thing if things do become difficult from time to time. Life goes through highs and lows as well as times of being unpredictable—but this isn’t a reason for worry and stress but rather an opportunity for personal growth and development.
The better prepared we are for change then the more likely those changes will be easy on us: sometimes life can get tough regardless but at least when we are prepared then it is easier to deal with. Why? Because when we understand what is going on around us and why it’s happening then we will be less likely to panic and more likely to take action.
So how do you prepare for change? There really isn’t one simple answer because everyone will have a different approach. Some like to research, some like to observe or even prepare by visualising that situation in their mind: whatever works best for you then use it! All you need is something which inspires confidence so that you can give yourself every opportunity of success, no matter what life throws at you next!
Watch and wait:
Some situations take time—the most obvious example of this is patience. We don’t always get what we want immediately: sometimes it takes weeks, months or even years! But the key to such situations is recognising that you will eventually get there—it may not be in exactly the same way but then again who says you have to follow a certain path?
If you’re feeling frustrated at having to wait for something, ask yourself why. Is it because you feel impatient? Or perhaps you are worried about whether or not life will go as planned? Whatever your answer, just remember that change on its own isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It allows us to adapt and adjust which means improving ourselves in some way! So instead of looking forward with hope or anticipation—try to do so with acceptance and understanding. Not only will this make the waiting time easier to handle, but it can also help us become better able to cope with change in the future!
Some situations we have no control over—they just happen regardless of what we want. But other times our mindset has a huge impact on how we feel about something; it’s for example why many people feel stressed or anxious because they see life as being stressful instead of enjoying its pleasures while they last! So if you find yourself suffering from stress or anxiety then perhaps it’s time to look at your attitude towards life instead?
The way we think is often shaped by everything around us: past experiences, our friends and family, our jobs and above all else our education. Yet just because we have picked up certain beliefs or habits doesn’t mean they are right! Each individual is different and so the way in which we think is going to be vastly different too—which means there will always be room for improvement regardless of how old you are! So if you find yourself struggling with something, try asking yourself why? What can I learn from this situation? How can I help myself deal with change better next time round?
What’s important is recognising when it might be time to change your attitude. We often learn more about life by being forced into situations than anything else: sometimes all we need to do is adjust our mindset instead of allowing ourselves to be overcome by panic or fear! It’s true that some situations will be easier to deal with than others but all we need to do is remember that nothing lasts forever—if you can accept this truth then it should help you relax.
Make a list:
Write down all the things which bring you stress in life (real or imagined): if there isn’t actually anything on your list then perhaps it’s time to make one? Life is more enjoyable when we are aware of what we have and not dwelling on what we don’t! So once you have made a list, start thinking about why each thing bothers you so much? Why does it cause so much worry and concern? What impact does such a thought have on your life?
You’ll probably find that most things on your list don’t matter in the grand scheme of things: if you take time to write them down, think about why they bother you so much and then ask yourself whether or not it is really worth worrying about. If the answer is no, then try working out how you can prevent such issues from causing any stress or anxiety. In other words, use your newfound understanding to improve your situation (or at least help you accept it).
Remember that life will always be full of ups and downs just like walking a mountain pass: we all want to reach our destination safely but sometimes there will be parts which are more difficult than others! What matters most is how we handle it—do we panic or do we remain calm? Such a choice isn’t easy, but by making an effort to understand ourselves and the various emotions which arise when things get tough, we can become better able to cope with change in the future!
Accept what is:
A lot of people suffer from anxiety because they think that life should be different than it is right now. In some cases this might be true: if you desire something which cannot exist, then it may cause stress as opposed to hope. Yet if you know deep down inside that there are certain aspects of your current situation which will never change, then try coming to terms with them instead of letting them make you uneasy. If the past does not change, then all we can do is learn from it—it’s not easy but as the saying goes “those who do not learn history are doomed to repeat it!
Of course changing our outlook on life isn’t always possible: sometimes we just need to accept what is instead of living in a fantasy world. Perhaps you feel trapped by your job or even your own family? Maybe you think the life you have isn’t good enough and so that causes stress and anxiety? Yet ‘what if’ scenarios don’t matter; only reality does: so perhaps it’s time to start thinking about how you can change things for the better instead of fantasising about something which will never exist?
As children, and also teenagers, many of us may have felt secure if our parents were around. But security doesn’t necessarily come just from a physical presence: it can come from an intangible feeling deep within ourselves that everything is going to be okay—a deep-rooted confidence that we’ll be able to handle whatever life throws at us.
And while security in the physical sense comes from knowing we have enough money to support ourselves and our families, this is not what I mean here. I am talking about a much more fundamental sense of security which has nothing to do with money! It is an inner security: a feeling that the world does not affect us, or does not touch us—that everything bad will pass over without lasting harm, allowing us to continue unhindered with our lives.
This ‘knowing’ within each of us must come from ourselves: no one can give it to you; no one can ensure you achieve it! You alone hold the key—and as long as you don’t try to keep it locked away in a safe, or bury it under the floorboards of your mind, you have every chance of achieving this inner security.
The problem is that if we do not develop our individuality then we can never become true individuals—and if we are not truly ourselves then there will always be some form of self-doubt in our minds.
In other words, we can never really feel secure unless and until we let go of what others want from us: being an individual means letting go of who you think you should be; it comes from searching within yourself for answers to questions which matter most to you—questions which no one else can answer for us!
It is about finding the courage to reject what others pass off as ‘the norm’ and being true to yourself. The good news is that once we start facing up to this, realising there are no easy answers or quick fixes, our self-confidence begins to grow naturally—we stop worrying about what other people think of us (and even if they don’t like what we do or how we live then it doesn’t matter because it makes them feel insecure rather than us!)
All of a sudden, life becomes uncomplicated again and all sorts of possibilities open themselves up which would otherwise remain hidden. But only when we stop trying too hard—when taking risks comes naturally—do things fall into place.
Think about it: what do you really need from life? There may be lots of things you want; there’s almost certainly a number of people who, for one reason or another, think that you should have certain things.
But when it comes down to your essential needs—the basics in life which we all seem to crave—what do you truly need to make yourself happy and feel secure? Food? Shelter? Friends? Love?
Do you need all the latest gadgets and toys (and perhaps even more than what other people might expect)? Or is there more than this in life—something else, something deeper beneath our materialistic desires which allows us to become truly fulfilled as human beings? Are they looking at their own priorities first before expecting others to do the same?
As we try to dig deeper within ourselves, and avoid being distracted by everyone else’s expectations of us (and by what they expect from us), there is only one thing we really have to ask ourselves—one question which will help clear away all the confusion and allow our inner security to emerge: what do I need right now in order to be truly content ?
Because this is your life—not anyone else’s! And you can follow whatever path makes most sense for you. The trick is not falling into a rut and staying comfortable because it ‘feels good’; instead, if you want true security in life, then risk yourself every so often in pursuit of your heart’s desires!
Try something new; make a change—even if it means you have to risk failure, or losing friends, or having your pride damaged (and yes, at times this is inevitable); because as long as you’re not doing what someone else wants or expects from you then you will know in your heart that it is right for you. And there is surely no greater security than that?
And what about when ‘bad things’ happen? How do we deal with these setbacks in life? Well, by reassuring ourselves that such disappointments are essential to our growth: they allow us to use the experience gained from them to improve who we are and how we live our lives.
If everything worked out perfectly all the time, there would be no personal growth; if nothing ever went wrong then we’d never know how to handle the situation when something did. And it is only by accepting that life is not going to run smoothly all of the time—that we will have our ups and downs—that we can face up to things with confidence.
We may feel insecure as individuals because we are so used to living for others, looking at what they expect from us rather than asking ourselves what truly matters in life.
But once we start focusing on our own values and beliefs—rather than trying to conform to what other people dictate (and being true to ourselves)—we find the strength within ourselves which allows us to be secure in who we are .
Success is not found in our pursuits, nor is it enshrined in the things which we own nor is it even achieved through personal power. It is within us; it flows out of us and can help make us feel secure so long as we are true to ourselves —true to who we really are at our core. But when we live for others, then any feeling of security or success (indeed, any sense of fulfilment) will only be an illusion because it has been placed there by someone else’s expectations of us—someone else’s hopes and dreams for how they want us to be.
It takes time and effort to break free from this self-imposed dependency on others’ approval (and on working hard towards what others want us to do and achieve in life); but when we manage it—when we learn that strength comes from within —we develop a security which cannot be taken away. And the best part of all is that now we don’t have to live up to anyone else’s expectations or be controlled by other people’s goals for our future; instead, we can choose what is right for ourselves , guided by our own heart and soul .